Advice for dating a widower
It was extremely selfish of them to treat me that way as my fiancé was just trying to move forward and be happy.Another thing you may need to get used to is being around "their" friends.But I also feel like maybe he’s not ready and i don’t want to be a rebound. In this particular case: he's probably still in love with his wife.That doesn't mean he doesn't want to/can't develop feelings for someone else, but you need to be prepared for the fact that she will be a part of his life forever, and especially since its been so recently, a big part.When I came into the widower's life, the family of the late wife was as cold as ice to me.At first I didn't understand it, but as time went on I began to realize why.
I also am not perturbed by the fact that she will always be part of him... I want to truly get to know him before we allow each other into our personal lives. I think he didn't talk because he was afraid to reveal to me that he wasn't fully ready for me. Talk about what you're uncomfortable with and what he needs to change so that you can be with him. You should not feel like a replacement, you should feel like #1 . For example, I read of a woman who's widower bf got married on New Years and that his deceased wife loved Valentine's day and they'd take a trip each year for it.
I believe what magnified that feeling was because it was soon after she died (a year).
I broke up with him, but I think we would have been OK had I met him perhaps 5 or so years after her death.
If you seriously have feelings for this man, be prepared for the fact that especially now at just 8 months, she'll "be around."She’ll always be there and it breaks my heart to think about the love that shared and how it ended. I would never want him to forget her or the love that they shared.
That indeed is such a beautiful thing and I wish that I will have that one day (a loving relationship with a partner).
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I just don’t know if I should let him down easy or see how things go...