Also the age when shidduchim start may vary by community.In frum circles, especially among Hassidim, eighteen is the age when shidduchim start and shadchanim take notice.Since it is considered to have been Heavenly foreordained whom one will marry, one's spouse is considered to be one's bashert by definition, independent of whether the couple's marital life works out well or not.The first recorded shidduch in the Torah was the match that Eliezer, the servant of the Jewish patriarch Abraham, made for his master's son Isaac (Genesis Ch. Abraham gave him specific instructions to choose a woman from Abraham's own tribe.on his/her character, intelligence, level of learning, financial status, family and health status, appearance and level of religious observance.A shidduch often begins with a recommendation from family members, friends or others who see matchmaking as a mitzvah, or commandment.If the shidduch does not work out, then usually the shadchan is contacted and it is he/she that tells the other side that it will not be going ahead.
However, when Eliezer proposes to take Rebekah back to Isaac in Canaan, he is told by Rebekah's family: "Let us ask the maiden" (i.e., Rebekah).This is taken as an instruction for Jewish parents to weigh their child's opinion in the balance during an arranged marriage.Regardless of whether proper procedure is followed, this is not the end of the decision - it is believed by Jews that the final say belongs to God, who may have different plans (compare with the match of Jacob and Leah).Some engage in it as a profession and charge a fee for their services.Usually a professional matchmaker is called a shadchan, but anyone who makes a shidduch is considered the shadchan for it.
Search for orthodox dating:
Those who support marriage by shidduch believe that it complies with traditional Judaism's outlook on Tzniut, modest behaviour in relations between men and women, and prevents promiscuity.