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They worry about his welfare and experience the loss of his companionship and day-to-day involvement in their lives.
Because treatment for depression has an extremely high success rate, the vast majority of people who seek treatment can manage their condition with therapy, medication and a supportive environment.
Wouldn't you prefer to start your life together with an atmosphere of genuine trust and emotional support?
You're understandably concerned about how someone you're serious about will react to your disclosure.
It's much more than feeling "down" for a day or two – some have described it as "living in a black hole," a depressed mood that seems to encompass most of one's life for days on end.
The person can be fatigued, have little interest in pleasurable activities (or any activity at all), and feel worthless or hopeless.
You can begin with a variation of, "I asked for advice about when to speak with you about an important matter, and this is the time I was advised." Then continue with the positive: "I hope that over the time we've been going out, you've been able to see that I have a good life and I feel healthy.
I'm building my career, I'm close to my family, I have great friends, and I take care of myself.
Fortunately, you've passed through a very challenging childhood, adolescence and young adulthood, and have found the right mix of medication, therapy and support to enable you to have a healthy, functioning life.
I feel comfortable with you and I hope you feel the same about me.
“At the same time, I have a medical condition called depression.
So what’s the optimal time to disclose this deeply personal information?
It's not something to share with someone you've just begun to go out with, but it's also not fair to reveal it immediately before you decide to "pop the question" – when your dating partner is so emotionally involved that she can't process the information with clarity.